I woke up at just gone 5am this morning, coughing up a lung or something, chest all rattling and then I had to drain every little last drop of petty I have even in the reserve tanks and this was all before I even remembered it was a New Music Friday so I’m in a strange suspended state between self-pity and raging temper right now. This is probably reflected in the reviews because I feel like I don’t care about anything released this week, but it might just be my mood talking. Anyways. Listen along HERE and have a better Friday than I’m going to this week.
DUKE DUMONT & GORGON CITY – ‘REAL LIFE’ ft. NAATIONS
Duke Dumont and Gorgon City are like… the production outfits that aren’t Rudimental or Disclosure. They’ve had hits sure, maybe even some bops, but no one is checking for them in the same way they did for those acts. This song is neither here nor there – though I really like the vocals on whoever is singing the topline – and I also realised I’m over 90s house piano. It’s 2017!
FIFTH HARMONY – ‘DOWN’ ft. GUCCI MANE ☑️
Oh man, I really wanted to love this. I like, spite stan Fifth Harmony now they’ve got rid of the racist member, so if you think I won’t play this until I’m obsessed you underestimate how petty I am, but if we’re being truly honest… this song doesn’t exactly go off. There’s nothing in the mix except beat and the melody isn’t interesting enough to lift it up. It kinda sounds like a tap dripping. However! They sound absolutely magnificent without that rat screeching and wailing over the top of them though. Can you imagine when they actually drop a banger?
THE JAPANESE HOUSE – ‘SOMEBODY YOU FOUND’ ☑️
The last release from The Japanese House – ‘Saw You In A Dream’ – really crept up on me with how much more I love it now than I did on first listen (and I liked it then) This is more of the same lush, hazy dreampop (which is so incongruous with the self-loathing lyrics!) and I’m already obsessed. Perfect quiet alone moment in the park at the end of a sunny afternoon music.
JULIA MICHAELS – ‘UH HUH’
This new Julia Michaels song leaves behind completely that awful linear sound she, and everyone she wrote for, rinsed to absolute death over the past eighteen months and moves her more into the Selena Gomez – ‘Bad Liar’ lane. Another sound Julia herself is responsible for! ‘Uh Huh’ has soft mumbly verses and an almost sarcastic exclamation for a hook. I much prefer this Fiona Apple/Jem/Liz Phair direction, especially right now when it feels fresh and not done to death, and while I probably won’t play it again since I find Julia’s voice unpalatable, this is a good song, I’m just not into it.
MISSY ELLIOTT – ‘I’M BETTER’ ft. EVE, LIL’ KIM & TRINA
When ‘I’m Better’ dropped in January I was so disappointed with how unremarkable it was – who knew all it needed was an injection of girl power and female solidarity to make it worth the time! The heavyweights of female rap line up on this remix from Lil’ Kim and Trina talking about how much wetter their pussies are, to Eve counting her money up, though Missy is absent from the mix other than her hollers of “REMIX!” There needs to be a happy medium in which we get rid of Lamb’s dead hook and replace it with Missy’s bridge from the original before this song becomes 10/10.
OLLY MURS – ‘UNPREDICTABLE’ ft. LOUISA JOHNSON
This is such a cheap sounding song – like proper written as the title theme for a mid-budget CBBC show cheap – but it’s not totally unpleasant. Olly Murs has turned down the funk slightly, so there’s tints of it here, but it isn’t the centre sound like it was in ‘You Don’t Know Love’ and other songs from that era. Louisa Johnson finally gets a chance, post X-Factor, to actually show that she can sing, but her voice remains anonymous and without personality. All in all, probably a waste of everyone’s time and money, but at least no one has embarrassed themselves.
THE VERONICAS – ‘THE ONLY HIGH’
The Veronicas really can sing you know. ‘The Only High’ is keys, vocals and a tiny little bit of percussion to beef it up and as much as I’m not into their empty, piano-led tracks, they really do remind you that they’ve got pipes on them. Another track I think y’all are gonna like more than I do. It’s sweet, I’m just not in the mood for it.
5 AFTER MIDNIGHT – ‘UP IN HERE’ ☑️
Oh. Listen, 5 After Midnight were the most viable act on last year’s X Factor, and there was an opportunity for them for sure, but this sounds like it could have been a JLS track? Obviously I’m very here for it, since I loved JLS, and there’s a great energy to it which could translate well if they get a good TV performance in (BGT finals?) but in the politest way… we’re almost 10 years on from JLS. Who is going to be playing this?