Alrighty. I’m in London, serenaded by drills again this morning and I also have some form of kidney infection. The antibiotics have mostly rid me of the horrible fever and stuff but my kidneys themselves actually hurt, like when I exhale too strongly. It’s far from ideal but I’m going home for a week for some R&R so what bangers will I be adding to my 2017 playlist to soothe me on the train back to Cov? (The gag is, I’ll actually have the Stormzy album on repeat.)
CALVIN HARRIS – ‘SLIDE’ ft. FRANK OCEAN & MIGOS ☑️
I don’t know if anyone else was holding their breath about this track – because it really could have gone either way – but I’m exhaling (slowly, because kidneys) with relief right now because this is just a fucking great song isn’t it? Calvin, for me, has been a super-one note producer for about 5 years, like… you could easily program a Calvin Harris Song Auto Generator with even just basic coding knowledge, y’know? But this doesn’t sound at all like a Calvin Harris production. It sounds like an expertly crafted summer banger, with a gorgeous Frank Ocean hook and some springy verses courtesy of Quavo and Offset from Migos. Calvin has needed to refresh his swag for a while, and what a way to reinvent. Song of the week.
THE CHAINSMOKERS & COLDPLAY – ‘SOMETHING JUST LIKE THIS’
I don’t get The Chainsmokers or Coldplay but I’ve also never worn a pair of slides or called a dog “doggo” so I accept that it’s cultural differences at play here. This was the big surprise collaboration of this year’s BRIT awards (which I may eviscerate next week) and it’s like… I don’t know, I’m not a believer but I do feel strongly like every day we move further and further away from God’s light. This song makes me miserable in a way I can’t explain. It’s so ENGINEERED for fun. Like I can see the moodboard that this song was inspired by and 100% it included pictures of white people running around at one of those powder paint parties. It’s not for me. It never will be.
ED SHEERAN – ‘SHAPE OF YOU’ REMIX ft. STORMZY ☑️
The REAL surprise collaboration of the BRITs, egregious chart botherer Ed Sheeran and actual human angel Stormzy pulled out a real fucking rollicker of a performance of admitted “choon” ‘Shape Of You’ which was great not just because the song is or because Stormzy is but because it came in a genuine spirit of collaboration – you can tell these boys have a lot of mutual love and respect for each other as artists and friends. Stormzy is about to own everything – check his ‘Ultralight Beam’ cover if you don’t believe me – and he completely owns this song with his adorable verse about his love for his girl. ‘Shape Of You’ is probably going to be number one from now until the nuclear apocalypse comes but I’m not that mad about it anymore.
ERA ISTREFI – ‘REDRUM’ ft. FELIX SNOW
Last year Era Istrefi had a very minor hit because she released a song that sounded like a Rihanna track. She scored a major label deal off the back of it and now here we are. I suppose someone, somewhere, thinks this was worth the money.
JASON DERÜLO – ‘SWALLA’ ft. NICKI MINAJ & TY DOLLA $IGN ☑️
Jason Derülo remains a reliable hit machine in spite of the distinctly gross metaphor this song is hung upon. What I like most about this song is how many opportunities it affords me to do a lil subtle air punch as I go about my business in these streets with my headphones in, thinking of how I’ma pop to this on my next night out. It’s just a big dumb island banger, get into it.
Also what is that artwork lmfao.
LANA DEL REY – ‘LOVE’ ☑️
This actually came out earlier in the week and you’ve all heard it and formed opinions already, but whatever. I don’t usually love Lana Del Rey, I find her very hard going and it’s frustrating because so many people whose opinions I respect are so into her and I just don’t get it, but I actually like this song a lot. It;s very lush and dramatic and “let’s fall in love despite the odds” and I guess that’s my vibe. I guess it’s all of our vibe at the moment, maybe? Things are a bit hopeless and crushing, but we have love and it doesn’t pay the bills but that’s okay. Maybe.
PALE WAVES – ‘THERE’S A HONEY’ ☑️
Oh yes, this is great. I mean, it sounds very like The 1975 (courtesy of production from Matty Healy and George Daniel of The 1975) but it’s… and I’m gonna whisper it… but it’s better? More instant, I think. Handclapping and crashing and not as self-conscious as The 1975 can sometimes be. God, it’s just so catchy. Hooks on hooks. I’m obsessed. No points for that artwork though… no, there’s nothing wrong with your screen, it’s literally just a black square.
ZEDD & ALESSIA CARA – ‘STAY’
I wanted to like this, because I like Alessia Cara a lot, but it’s a bit naff? I don’t know. I’m gonna give it some growing room I think, because it has a nice energy and momentum but on first listen I’m whelmed.
THE 1975 – ‘BY YOUR SIDE’ ☑️
A lovely cover of a lovely song in support of Warchild. The vocals are obviously not worth mentioning when you consider Sade sang the original and besides they’re filtered to fuck and back, but I do like how faithful they’ve been to the original while still making it sound very The 1975.